Let's just put it out there. I hate the gym. I don't even like going to the gym at my office. I have always been a team sport girl. I got my exercise from playing soccer, volleyball, kickball or whatever other group event you asked me to join. I even started to enjoy running because I was outside and could rock out to my music. But I have always, always hated the gym. I have had more gym memberships over the years than I can count or remember and have spent thousands upon thousands of dollars on memberships that have gone wasted. I start out strong, but within a month or so, I stop going. I convince myself to keep the membership because spending that amount of money will motivate me to go back. It never does.
This post is not about how I adore the gym now, but more about how I am slowly starting to tolerate it...
Reasons I hate the gym:
1. Locker Rooms. I am pretty confident about my body. I know who I am and what I look like. I grew up dancing and playing soccer which forced me to change my clothes in the most public of places. But nothing, nothing will prepare you for the women's locker room. You are crammed into a tiny corner with 8 other women and 16 nipples staring at you. It's not that I think that they need to be more private or cover up, it's simply that sometimes, I would rather you turn your back to me when you put on your bra. My favorite so far was the woman who stood in the vanity area (you know, the horseshoe shaped area that has mirrors on EVERY wall to dry your hair and put on make-up) stark naked, and got ready. I can find ways to avert my eyes when you are at a locker near me, but when I am surrounded by mirrors, there is NO WHERE to look. Your naked body followed me every where I tried to turn.
Also, since I am a bigger girl, I can't use the towels they provide at the gym to cover up. Mainly because their towels only cover a thigh and a half on me. So, I trudge around in my giant grey beach towel feeling awkward.
2. I have no idea what I am doing. Really, I don't. I obviously know how to use the treadmill and the elliptical, as well as other similar machines, but with my bum foot, I can barely do those types of exercises. So, even after meeting with a few trainers and reviewing options, I leave confused. One trainer tells me that I should never use the machines, they won't give you the best workout. Another trainer only tells me to use the machines. Even if I used the machines, which ones do I use? On what days? What weights do I put them at? I know now to do reps of 12, (at least that is what one trainer told me) but am I doing them right?
3. Walking into a new class alone scares the crap out of me. I love taking classes. I have driven down to Racine (a 45 minute hike) with my sister to take a Zumba class on more than one occasion. But to just pick a class and drop in? Everyone else will know more than me! They will all stare and laugh at me as I struggle through the moves! Yes, I realize these ideas are all in my head, but it's hard to tell those voices to shut up.
4. I struggle to motivate myself to keep going. Getting there is half the battle, right? Not for me. If I feel like the treadmill is kicking my butt, I will usually stop instead of powering through. Some people will say that its ok, I am just listening to my body. Well, my body is a whiny little bitch. Sometimes, it just needs to get slapped and told to MTFU. I just find it hard to tell myself to do that some days. Now, put me in a room or a pool with a personal trainer and I will push myself as far as I can go. I am a people pleaser, so having a personal trainer works very well for me. The problem is, a gym membership for me is $65. Then 30 minutes with a personal trainer is another $30-$40. That adds up quickly.
5. I am an instant gratification type of girl. I know that there is no logic behind this, but I want to go to the gym on a Monday and wake up 2lbs lighter on a Tuesday. I know that's not how it works. But I will go to the gym for a full week and see no changes and get totally down on myself. Which in turn, makes me ot want to go back the next week.
I completely understand that these are all in my head. I know I should just keep it up, keep trying and keep asking for help, and I will get there. Right now, I am spending the extra money on seeing a personal trainer 2-3 times a week. It motivates me and helps me to learn what I should be doing while I am at the gym. But even those mornings, post swim, I feel awkward sitting in front of the mirrors, still red faced from the intense pool workout I just endured. Luckily, my foot is slowly getting better and soon I will be able to start biking and running to supplement my workouts and should be able to cut down my personal trainer visits. But until then, I may need to find a workout buddy.
So, who wants to go to the WAC with me?!?!?
16 nipples staring at me - LOL!
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