I don't love my baby more than my dogs

"You have a baby and completely forget about your pets."

"We had to give away our dog because after we had a baby, we just didn't have time for him anymore."

I heard this over and over again before I had a baby. It was one of the reasons I was never sure if I wanted kids. My heart swells when I think of the love I have for my pets. I call my dog Clancy my soul mate. I would do anything for my pets. Anything.

No one talks about having a newborn and pets and everyone being happy. No one talks about making it work. Well, I did. It's not easy, but we make it work.

Do my dogs get as much attention as they used to? Probably not. I know it has dipped a little because I am now sharing my attention between them and a four month old baby. Every day though, I make sure that I make time for them. It's as simple as handing my daughter off to my husband and getting on the ground and wrestling with them. Or taking five minutes to play fetch or tug or war. And when I'm on the couch snuggling my daughter, I encourage them to come cuddle up next to us. 

I understand that I only have one child and that she is a really good baby. This really isn't the case for everyone. But part of having a child was, for me, having someone to include in my life. I didn't want to have a baby and change my life completely. I didn't want to be a different person because I had a child. I wanted to be a better person, with a child. 

I'm sure that there is some smart ass out there asking "But what if your house was one fire? You would grab your kid first right?" Honestly? I'd probably have a baby in one arm and a dog or cat in the other. And that's a stupid question, stop asking it. 

I can be realistic, however. If I ever thought that my dogs we're going to be unstable around my daughter and that there was absolutely, 100% no way that I could trust them around her, even supervised, I would find them a new home. That's partially because I want my daughter to be safe, but it's also because if my dogs are being aggressive around my baby unprovoked, that means that they are unhappy too. And I want what's best for all of us. 

I don't love my baby more than I love my dogs. I love them both. Period. 

I'm a dog mom who had a baby

I was never one of those women who knew they were going to have kids. Pets, however, were another question.

I have been surrounded by pets since birth. We had dogs, cats, fish and birds in the house. Animals always mysteriously followed me home. New neighbors moving in? I knew all of their pets names long before I knew who the people were.

No one was shocked when I took a job at a doggy day care and studied to become a groomer. It always seemed that working and being around animals was my destiny. Even when I had an office job, I spent my free time grooming my favorite dogs and volunteering to train therapy dogs. My pets are my family. At my wedding we had seven humans and four dogs in the wedding party. My ushers were a poodle and his owner. I take this dog mom business very seriously.

Before I was married, my now husband I and talked about having kids. Neither one of us was positive we wanted any, but we needed to make sure that we were on the same page. The one thing I knew for sure was that I wanted to wait at least one year after we got married to even consider having children. I wanted to enjoy married life with our little family of two humans, four dogs and two cats. I wanted to travel, I wanted to be able to go out whenever I wanted without worrying about a babysitter.

So we did. That year turned into two years. We went to Puerto Rico, Ireland and Scotland. I visited friends and family in California and Florida. We ate out whenever we wanted and rarely turned down a night out at the bar.

Then one night, we found out that our best friends were expecting. And all of the sudden, we were talking about having kids again.

I tried to figure out why I wanted a child. It wasn't a strong maternal instinct kicking in. I wasn't going completely gaga over every new baby I saw on the street. For me, most of it tied back to my love of dogs.

I wanted to have a child in my life that I could raise to be passionate. As passionate as I am. They didn't necessarily have to be crazy about dogs like I am, (although I will admit that it would be a bit disappointing if they weren't...) but I wanted them to be passionate about something. I realized how scary our world is with people just riding through accepting what is happening around them. I wanted to raise a child who voices their opinion regardless of what it is. I want to raise someone who will stand up for what they believe in and hopefully be a voice for good.

And that is what I am trying to do. My sweet baby girl came into our lives 10 days late because she knew she had to make an entrance and wasn't going to start out on someone else's schedule. Will she be crazy about dogs like her mom? Only time will tell.