The Difference Between a Resolution and a Goal

I realized around the end of December/beginning of January that I had completely, yet unintentionally, abandoned my blog. I spent the first few weeks of January deciding when to start again. I didn't want to start too soon and look like a bandwagon resolution person, but I didn't want to wait that long since it had been more than 2 months since my last post.

This lead to me thinking a lot about the idea of a New Years Resolution and wondering why I was so against them. What it boiled down to was the notion that many, many resolutions fail. Many goals fail as well, but it seemed worse to be tied to a "resolution". To be clear, I am not anti-resolution, I just didn't feel like it was right for me.

My goals haven't changed since before the new year. I still want to complete a triathlon this summer. Along with that comes the goals of running a 5k again, becoming a better swimmer and getting faster on my bike. But to come out the first week of January and re-proclaim all of those things made me feel like I was cheapening what I had already set out to do.

What I have found is simply that the new year has given me a reinvigorated passion for my goals. While I still feel nervous about completing a triathlon, I am more excited than scared. I don't need a resolution to help me complete a goal, I just need the desire. I got this.

Anniversary

One year ago, I started swimming.

Well, one year ago, I got into the water with a swim instructor.

I knew "how" to swim, but I wasn't very good and I wanted it to become a real workout for me. The first few months were in the smaller of the two pools and involved a lot of walking, or kick boards. I even got to the point of swimming a front crawl with my face out of the water because I didn't know how to breathe properly yet.

By summer, I was in the lap pool, working not only on my front crawl, but also on my breast stroke. Each week I progressed a little at a time. Going further and swimming faster.

A few weeks ago, I swam a half mile without stopping. This is beyond a major accomplishment in my book. It's something I never dreamed I could do.

I get giddy now looking at new swimsuits, goggles and swim caps. I read up on new techniques and accessories to see what my help me become a better swimmer.

Moral of the story? I freaking love swimming.

I feel better after a swim. And when I miss one, my mood is definitely darker.

To celebrate this momentous anniversary, my swim instructor taught me how to do something I never thought I would do, the butterfly. It is a beautiful stroke when done correctly, so I am sure I look like a fish out of water, but I am loving the challenge. I am even loving my war wounds when I take my arms too wide and jam my thumb into the lane line. (Those things are awful!)

I finally really, truly feel like a swimmer. I may have started this journey as just another way to exercise with a bum foot, but it has developed into part of life. Being in the water makes me feel calm and at peace even when my heart is thumping trying to keep up with my workout. After a good swim, I feel like my life is more in order and that I can get back to work, or back home and take on any other task that is in front of me.

I still feel a little self-conscious around other swimmers as I don't have a swimmer body, but as a woman, I feel like that will always be there to an extent. Instead of fretting over it though, I am going to embrace it. You've been swimming since you were six? Well, I just learned a year ago and look at me now.

The Key to Blogging is Consistency

Ah, yes, blogging. That thing that I thought I would do all the time. I thought I would have SO much to talk about. People would be wowed by my awesomeness. The truth is: I got bored with me. If I was bored, God knows the rest of you would have been bored reading about my boringness.

So I thought about how to be un-boring. And I realized the truth. That ain't never going to happen.

What I did instead was find ways to get re-motivated. Sure, I was still swimming twice a week with an instructor and meeting with my personal trainer once a week, but I had stopped pushing myself. I was still scared to walk into the pool on my own. What would happen if the lanes were full? Do I wait? Do I ask to share? Will the other people judge me for being such a slow swimmer? Is it ok that after about 75 yards I have to take a breath every time?

I started becoming less worried about what others were thinking and more worried about how I was progressing. In practice I would swim around an 700, but that was with drills and stopping to chat with my instructor. It was time to see what I could actually do.

So I did it. I started swimming all by my lonesome.

And I realized something awesome.

I can swim a full half mile. I pause here and there for a sip of water, but never more than a 20 second break.

Then I realized something else. My sprint tri only requires me to swim a half mile. And I have until August to get better at it, to be faster, more efficient.

My final realization came. I got this.

I also realized, I should blog more.....